Please fasten your seatbelts and put your tables in the upright position. Crew members with tasers and unhappy memories of a life lived poorly will be stopping by to confirm your compliance and collect any unwanted headphones. We’ll be touching down on planet earth on the 16th of December. Weather conditions are poor, with grey skies and relentless rain expected for the next four months. Please enjoy your stay on earth and be sure to recommend Space FM to all your friends or next time that ‘turbulence’ won’t just be a passing thing.
And to go along with that joyous news something slightly less cheerful, depending on your point of view. Laikanist Times, my first foray into the Indie publishing world which, until now, has been available for free will soon be, well, not free. Why? Because I’m moving it exclusively to Amazon, along with everything else and Amazon don’t want you to have nice things because Amazon doesn’t love you. Plus as this site has started to become more and more of a repository for my work there’s a hefty amount of stuff that’s already available gratis. Which I’m happy with and the plan is to keep this place as a kind of notebook for rough drafts, snippets, side notes and samples from upcoming projects. But the flip side of that is that I’m not sure I need to offer L.T. as a free taster any more.
Disagree? Feel free to let me know. Like Frasier Crain I’m listening. Also I’m drunk on fine wine and talking shite most of the time.
Another day another obligatory plug for the splendiferous ‘Laikanist Times’ – enlightenment in novella form and still available for free here.
Laikanist Times was an odd one. Written in fits and starts through times of excess, confusion and random travelling which bordered on self abuse it came out as the apple of my eye. Not to everyone’s taste, I’ve since discovered, as is often the case at the strange and surreal end of things, but still something I’m proud of.
It’s long since broken through the 1,000 download mark, which I always thought was quite an impressive number and by now it should be closing in on 2,000 although I make a duty of not checking how well anything I’ve written is doing for fear of actually finding out. And rough and ready though it remains it’ll always have a little corner of my heart trapped in its doggy jaws. For something that came out so strange and disjointed it’s still probably the most immediate and ‘easy’ thing I’ve ever written, fuelled as it was by nothing more abstract than my own desire to sit down and flood words on to the screen.
Anyway, download it.
… my novella’s free tonight. Amazon have finally caught up with my own largesse and made Laikanist Times permafree on both their US and UK sites. Same should apply to the rest of the world of course but if it doesn’t then give it a week or so and the change should filter through.
Be sure to post a review if you enjoy – they’re like crack for unknown authors and by that I mean I will stab you if you short me.
And, of course, Crashed America is still out and available.
I once used a Ouiji board to get in touch with Steve Jobs and tell him that I thought his products were vastly overrated, his distribution system overly controlling and his company greedy and lawsuit happy. As an act of revenge he made me drop my Android phone and crack the screen, so basically fuck that guy. But as someone once said, times change, tough men don’t and having checked that I’m not a tough man I may have to adjust my thinking. Especially as Laikanist Times is now available via Apple’s ebook service. Download it now before the vengeful spirit of Steve Jobs decides to remove it! And then review it, in the hope of appeasing him.
Take a bite from the Apple
Well, I’ve been to a lot of places at least but not as many as Laikanist Times is starting to go to. It’s now available for free on both Scribd and Barnes & Noble (as well as Smashwords and this site). Still waiting for Amazon to adjust the price to free and the only way to get them to speed the process up is to go to the book page and hit the option to ‘tell us about a lower price’ below the product info. Copy in the link to Smashwords and with any luck they’ll do their price match thing. A far from convenient workaround but such is the way of things. And if you could help out it’d be much appreciated.
Also much appreciated are reviews, whether they’re on Amazon, Goodreads, Smashwords, the back of a beer mat, a sleeping childs face – whenever, wherever it’s all good. Unless it’s bad of course, in which case screw you. Anyway, updates to follow when Amazon gets sorted.
Barnes & Noble (Nook)